Hello everyone. I hope you are in good spirits. Before saying anything, I apologize for my lack of updates recently. I know I let a lot of you down, especially my patrons. What I’m going through is not an excuse to ignore my responsibilities. With that, I truly am sorry.
I’ve been putting off writing about this for quite a time. I can’t find words to describe how I’m feeling. The world as I knew it turned dark in an instant. It feels like I lost my spark. As if nothing but dying embers remain from my once raging fire.
Marie Claire, my girlfriend, died on the 24th of August this year. She was 34 yrs old. She was an architect, and we’d been dating since September last year. Despite our distance and hectic schedules, we’ve spent as much time together as possible. Claire came into my life when I needed it most.
Much like me, Claire guarded her heart the best she could. But that didn’t stop her from taking a chance on me. For the longest time, I convinced myself that love wasn’t for me. After countless failed relationships, I believed that I didn’t deserve it. Then, she came.
Relationships are not always rainbows and butterflies, but we always manage through. Claire and I had been far from perfect, but I loved her for it. She taught me that even someone as jaded as me deserves love.
I will cherish my time with Claire. I will never forget how the coffee tasted a little sweeter when I was with her. I will miss the after-work calls, the wake-up texts, and the endless daydreams we shared. I will miss our arguments and a dozen trivial things that didn’t seem to matter back then.
What I love the most about Claire is that she knows my priorities. She loved my daughter so much and supported her in ways she could. She knew how important being a father was to me. So much so that she did not want to interfere with my ability to be a father. She was willing to travel here, so I’m just a text away from my daughter.
Now, I’m doing my best to cope with her absence. I try to take care of myself as much as I can. I know Claire would like that. I’ll honor her and let her live on in my heart.
I will admit that life without Claire was not easy. Every day is a struggle. There are days when I don’t want to get up out of bed. There are moments when sadness seems to take over, and I am lost. How can someone get over this?
I honestly think you can’t. You just try your best to live with it and hope you’ll somehow make it. I will bear this until the end of my days.
I love Claire to the moon and back. I will continue to love her until the end of time. I love her so much. No one could ever replace her. Claire rests in my heart, and I will live the rest of my days in memory of her.
I would regard Claire as one of my life’s greatest love, and I will forever immortalize her with her smile. A smile that is so radiant that it brought serenity to my weary heart, casting out its darkness. It was bright as a thousand suns. She was my light; she was love.
How did you know
I needed someone like you in my life?
That there’s an empty space in my heart?
You came at the right time in my life
I’ll never forgetChiqui Pineda, How Did You Know
How you brought the sun to shine in my life
And took all the worries and fears that I had
I guess what I’m really trying to say
It’s not every day that someone like you comes my way
No words can express how much I love you