People hate to hear that they are wrong. It’s how it is; more often than not, they indeed are. But try your best not to condemn them – anyone can do that.
There is a reason why others think and act the way they do. Most of the time, most of us fail to see that. We just know the effect but never the motivation behind an action. Instead, try to understand them.
We can commonly see this at work. When someone is underperforming, our natural reaction is to fire that employee. We never bother asking what’s wrong.
Put yourself in other people’s shoes if you find yourself irritated by their actions. See how you would react to the situation. Becoming interested in the motivation makes you less likely to dislike the effect.
Having compassion for others’ viewpoints is the foundation of relationships. Stop focusing on your concerns. Take a minute to try to see things from other people’s perspectives. It would surprise you to see that even you would feel the same way.
In conversations, show the other person you value their ideas and feelings as much as yours. By governing what you say by what you like to hear, you encourage them to have an open mind to your ideas. Doing so gives them a purpose or direction in the conversation.
Unless you respect other people’s opinions, they won’t listen to what you have to say. Any conversation you have with them would feel forced. What’s worse is that it makes them resentful of you.
You can observe this best with kids. You can bark out orders all you like, yet at the end of the day, they just won’t listen. But try to see things from their perspective and see what happens.
With a discernment of their feelings and little tact, they are more willing to listen. There would be no sulking and no resentment. They would feel amicable and won’t feel forced to obey orders.
Seeing things through another person’s eyes ease tensions when personal problems become overwhelming. Before asking anyone, try to think about the whole thing from their point of view. It will take time, but it will avoid resentment. It will get more pleasing results with less friction.
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Very well written. Loved it.
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Glad you liked it!
One of the things I am learning from A Course in Miracles is that there are 2 motives to action:
– expressing love
– a call for love
We easily see expressions of love. But the calls for love seem tough to see because these pleas seem masked in rudeness, anger, harsh judgment, and the agitated people we all have come across. However, when someone irritates you it becomes an opportunity to see things both from their point of view, and from their call for love. Reaching this space creates peace of mind and a stronger connection with fellow human beings.
Mr. A, your discussion encourages each of us to share empathy, patience, and kindness to others.