Talk About Their Interests, Not Yours

Greetings Barbarians! Long days and pleasant nights!

Have you ever asked yourself how to be interesting? I’m guessing at one point you’ve asked it, I knew I did! But how exactly to be interesting? 

While many would argue that to be interesting, you have to be yourself, I’m afraid that it is not as simple as that. 

As a blogger, it is my job to catch people’s attention and captivate my readers with stories and lessons. I try to make my writings for you as much as for me. When I first started, I did seek an outlet from the buzzing of daily life. As I delve deeper, I soon found out that it’s not about what you want to write but who would want to read it. Sure, it would be nice to write about the weird medical condition of your dick but who would want to read that? 

So, how to be interesting, not only in writing but in real life? Yes, it includes being yourself but it also means expanding yourself. It involves a lot of exposure and learning because it means stepping out and see what others see. 

But before we proceed, hit the like button, subscribe to my blog and follow us on social media! I’ll provide the links down below. While you are at it why not check out my Patreon page where I’m offering exclusive content! Get access to my Patreon feed and content you can’t get anywhere else. Take part in Q&A and polls, get to decide what content you want to see. Make requests and shoutout in every post! Still not convinced? You could check this testimonial from one of my Patrons.

I’ve been reading Mr. A’s blog for over a year now. I enjoy reading all of his posts, whether they’re light-hearted topics like how to color match your outfits and how to do yoga (barbarian style!), to more intimate entries where he shares personal thoughts on life, love, being a parent and everything in between. Being a fellow creative, I admire his zest for life, despite how challenging life can be sometimes (as it can be for all of us) – and how he translates this into words and experiences that others can relate to and learn from. If you’d like to read genuine, heartfelt content that speaks to you as a person – not just another random passer-by on the internet, then I highly recommend subscribing to his Patreon, where you can get exclusive content and make requests, which I think he’d be happy to oblige where possible – I actually asked him to teach me Tagalog! (Lessons are fun and he’s extremely helpful) People with strong work ethics are difficult to come by these days, and I don’t think I’ve met another blogger/writer who pours as much dedication and passion into his work than Mr. A. If you can get a coffee from a nice cafe 2-3 times a week, then being a Patreon for the price of a latte is a small price to pay to support a single father’s dreams of providing for his family. I hope you never stop writing, Mr. A! All the best.


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Eyes may be the window to another person’s soul but the road to a person’s heart is through his interests. In my previous post about social skills, I’ve talked about what do to if you want people to resent you. I said that if you want people to think you are a jerk then you should talk nothing but yourself. Keep on talking even when no one is around, and if someone talked then cut them out. That is a sure-fire way to brand yourself as an asshole. 

Need an example? I got you! But, I will talk about this as an example and nothing else. It is not to slander anyone or put anyone in a bad light, It is only an example.

A few weeks ago, I find a series of comments in my spam folder that’s requesting me to follow his blog and gave me his link. Yes, comments with links are sent to my spam folder and I rarely check it. So, I apologize to anyone whose comment I didn’t reply to. Now, me being a Yes! Man, I followed the blog and read what he has to say. I’ve got to admire the work ethics, he is posting two articles a day. He is not even lazy about promoting his content. He has the work ethic of a professional and a successful blogger, so why did I unsubscribe to his blog?

Simple answer, I’ve lost interest. You see, despite posting twice a day, he writes the things that he only likes, in a manner of his liking. There is nothing wrong with that, but you have to ask yourself what do they want to read? And sometimes, that includes writing things you don’t want to write about. Why do you think companies spend good money on analytics? That means writing in a manner that everyone could understand. It is not about being a slave to people’s opinion but rather putting yourself in their shoes. No matter how special you think you are if you are not asking yourself what’s in it for them, then I’m afraid they will not see it. 

Now, let me tell you about the most influential man in my previous office. He is so influential that even the CEO, our boss, listens to him. And no, he is not a member of the board of directors but rather a humble maintenance personnel. While you might be asking how come the guy who mops the floor is more influential than the boss. You might be wondering if my boss is nice because I assure you that’s not even the case. You see, this person took a minute of his time every single day to ask everyone how they are. Yep, every single one, from the administration staff up to the production staff. He was making an effort to know everyone that when its time for him to say something, everyone listens. Everyone wants to listen to the guy who mops, not because they need to. But when our boss speaks, we listen because we need to. Can you see the difference?

Maybe I’m wrong or may maybe I’m right, but you can’t deny that your actions towards others matter. 

Talk about what interests them and avoid talking about what doesn’t. But how would you know what their interests are? 

Make sure you do your research and be a keen observer. I know it sounds like you’re trying too hard but trust me you won’t. You will make a complete fool of yourself if you keep on talking about things you don’t know. Instead, try asking them questions that they would enjoy. If you notice them wearing a great pair of shoes, try asking them where they got it. If you see someone happy, try telling them they have a wonderful glow today. Make it about them as much as it is about you. 

I’m not saying that this is the only and best way to be interesting. I will, however, say that this is the simplest way to be interesting. You could spend your time becoming a rockstar to be interesting. But to tell you the truth, you could be twice as interesting twice as fast by talking more about others’ interests. 

To Courage, Freedom, and the most interesting person in the world!

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5 thoughts on “Talk About Their Interests, Not Yours

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  1. It boils down to being a giver rather than a taker: success in every domain of life comes from putting other people’s interests ahead of ours and blogging is no exception. I must admit that sometimes I fall into the trap of writing what I like and, in fact, the only posts I have written that have got decent traffic are the the ones in which I have first considered what others may need to hear

    Liked by 1 person

  2. You are so right! I sold some of my fry (baby fish) a few days ago and I got conversing with my buyer about coronavirus and the lockdown. She told me she had to wear face masks for work and I asked her what she does. To me, asking about people should come as second nature and I can’t stand it when people have to ask “so what are you jnto?” as though it pains them, because it shouldn’t. Finding out what people like or don’t like, are or aren’t into should be something that we all do, as bloggers and as decent people. Personally, I try and remember a) what my readers write about or like to read and b) something about each of my readers. I’m not entirely successful 100% of the time but my readers aren’t just figures – they’re people!

    Oh, and on the topic of commenters, I too had one like the one you mentioned in your post. Every post, he would just comment with exactly the same comment. I thanked him one day and he asked me to visit and follow him and I could just tell that his identical comments were all about spamming my comments sections in the name of easy follows. Crucially, it was lazy blogging at its finest. We all work hard and we all wish blogging was sometimes easier than what it can be, but that’s still not a reason to not contribute something useful to the discussion 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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