Stay with Her Intensity

Greeting Barbarians! Long days and pleasant nights!

“Why can’t you calm down and take it easy?” is one question used too often by us men. As I’ve said before, men like to analyze the problem and come up with an answer. Rationalization is a trait that is embedded in our DNA. We either try to get to the bottom of things or stay on top of things. If we can’t, we either disdain the things we can’t have or close ourselves from it. In our mind, why bother wanting something we can’t have, right?

While there are circumstances that this is correct, like everything else in life, it is situational. Like I always say, it doesn’t mean that if you are a hammer, you’ve got to treat everything else as nails. There are instances where brute force is called upon and there are instances where certain delicateness is needed. It doesn’t mean that if there is a naked woman in front of you, gives you any right to fuck her unless she told you to. Some men have a difficult time accepting that some things are just are.

After being called out as misogynistic, I have thought of stop writing about the intricate relationship between a man and a woman. But women deserve love, understanding, and care, thus I will continue writing. I will not even attempt to explain myself. I understand that not everyone shares my sentiments as others my see my views as a bit outdated. Yet, I’m a firm believer of keeping what works and throwing away what doesn’t. There is no need to throw away traditional values that work for you. After all, these are my values; I’m in no way imposing it to anybody. At the end of the day, all I wanted for you is to be happy and well. And for Christ’s sake, be kind to one another!

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Most men avoid complexities that is why some men choose to either fix or avoid the feminine complications. Most of the time you would find him say he will come back later when the time is right. But what if I told you that these complicated moments is the time your woman needs you the most?

One of the greatest pleasures of the feminine is when a man is present and unfazed amid a chaotic storm. It is the moment when a man is present in his commitment to love cutting through the difficult layers. It is when she could relax and trust your capacity for love. 

The way you relate to your woman is the way you relate to the world. If you bully your woman into being okay, then you bully the world into being okay. If you are terrified of your woman and her temperament then you are terrified of the ever-changing chaos of the world. But if you are unperturbed with the challenges your woman presents to you then you are undisturbed with challenges of the world. The way you love your woman is the way you love the world and how you love your woman is the reflection of how you love yourself. 

Don’t fret – there is hope as you can train yourself to master the world by learning how to be free and loving. You do so, by standing your ground and loving that only love prevails. You can’t quit even when you seem to lose but rather learn from your mistake and keep on loving. You can never change the tide but you can always ride the surf. 

Yes, the tide can stamp you out and your woman could hurt you but this is how you’ll learn. You get up, compose yourself, dive into the ocean, and face your woman again. You only get to choose between fear and mastery, mediocrity, and greatness. Sure, you can quit and choose a smaller wave or a much easier woman; no one will hold that against you. But if you want to live a significant life, you’ve got to rise to the challenge that is the world and your woman. 

Keep your resolve and attention. No matter what your woman says or does, love her. Make a conscious choice to keep on loving despite the complications. Do whatever you could to give love. After all, love is not just romantic sentiments; it is also adherence to service and duty. 

To live a significant life is to find each situation, workable – to change each situation through the lenses of love. Life is knowing that everything is going to rise and fall, then arise again and loving every moment of it. 

To Courage, Freedom, and Women!

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13 thoughts on “Stay with Her Intensity

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    1. This is something my wife and I are going through right now, it is a phase in life where rationality could do more harm than good. The less you understand, the more you need to understand 😅 dunno if that makes sense at all.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. I understand it very well. I hope that things sort itself out with your wife. I really doesn’t matter if you understanding or not. The important thing is for you to love her during these moments.

        Cheers to you!


    2. Love is not a feeling but a constant decision. Just like what my therapist said love is patience. During the time of Jesus, patience means “long-suffering” therefor, love means long-suffering. I’m not sure thou if that is historically accurate.

      Liked by 2 people

  1. I’m reading you and… the book comes back to me : Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. It’s pretty close to your experience. No, you’re not a macho. You’re a really wonderful guy 🙂 Barbara

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Take it from a guy who has been at it a long time, this is difficult to learn. Especially if you are a bit old school in some of your views on marriage and relationships (like my wife and I). However, if you take the time and just listen you will find most people will work out their own problems. They just need an ear to work it out. Too many people lack the skill of listening because the are too busy formulating what they want to say next.

    When you are truly skilled, your advice for her will seem like it came from her…

    Liked by 3 people

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