Greetings Barbarians! Long days and pleasant nights!
Men are simple creatures. If we encounter a problem, we find the cause and fix it. We tend to solve all life’s problems like that. We get to root of the problem and fix it once and for all. Such is a man’s way of thinking. We are the hammer that strikes the nail that sticks out.
But that is not always the case. Even if you are a hammer, you cannot treat everything else like nails. When a man needed shelter, he could make one. If he needed food, he could forage for food. Whatever the problem is, he will attempt get to the bottom of it and find the answer. But that is not the case when dealing with women.
I have my fair share of problematic relationships – from jealous lovers to lovers with serious mental health issues. It was never easy, relationships are never easy even if you are with the right person. My only regret was I never showed I loved or cared enough, or at least that’s what I’ve told myself.
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Men, we love our women, there’s no doubt about that. Why would we even engage in any form of intimacy if we didn’t? So, it is only natural for us to do something whenever we see our women upset. We begin to ask questions to find out what the problem is and fix it, much like a hammer driving down a nail. Yet, I would beg to differ that that is not always the case. Most of the time she would get even more upset by your attempts to analyze the problem. And who wouldn’t be?
You also can’t say to your woman to suck it up. While I’d agree that saying so would make your woman a bit tougher, I would doubt that she would feel any better. And the more you make her “tougher” the more she becomes colder until she is no longer capable of warmth. You are extinguishing the essence of her womanhood.
But what should we do if we cannot help her or let her “deal” with her problems? It is pretty obvious by now what to do. Whenever you see your woman upset, resist the urge to fix her. Before you ask her any questions or let her deal with her problems, show her that you love her first. Give her a passionate kiss and put her into your arms. Give her your love, assure her that everything would be all right. Sing her favorite song, make her feel loved and cared for. Quell the storm that rages in her heart. Once the storm passes, then try to find out what the problem is.
What if she rejects your advances? Yes, it might be that the problem is so serious that you can’t do anything about it. Or she’s already fed up with your attempts to analyze her. She feels that she has become just another nail for you to hammer. She has become so tough that your love can no longer penetrate her. She has lost her trust in your capacity for love. By then you are only presented with two options: leave or love her even more. That is all up to you.
Women are like the weather. They are ever-changing, sometimes severe, and sometimes gentle. But at the end of the day, all women want is to feel love. She wants to feel that your love does not falter regardless of any situation.
To Courage and Freedom, and Women!
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A Barbarian in Gentlemen's Clothing 
… well…. I have to say that you’re right – … a woman will pay attention to details like: you left very quickly this morning, you acted as if I was a piece of furniture in the house, you don’t look at me like you used to… I know, I said it. And I could see my friend’s amazement when I said that.
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The “2 options” gave me the feels. It feels like either of the two can be an act of love. This is beautiful Mr. A. Thank you.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Smiles if
if i try to
Solve
My
Wife
Or Any
Other Woman
i become the Problem
Better Reason
Listening
With
Love A
Muscle Anyone
May Develop when
Reason Becomes
The
Loving
Touch
Of
Healing
HeART Listening
Then Comes
The
Reward
Just a
HeART
Felt SMiLe…
If That’s Not
Enough Go
Back To
HeART
Muscle Class🎶
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I must say that you nailed this post! 👏👏👏
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Thank you Mia! I’m glad you liked it. Cheers!
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Mr. A, you never shy away from the challenging discussions here. Women are definitely wired different than we men. Many men operate like watching syrup fill each square of a waffle . . . they have a plan as they tackle life, one square at a time. Women, on the other hand, are filled with emotions . . . each emotion connects to another emotion, like spaghetti on a plate.
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Hi Teach! Sorry for the late reply.
Yes, I agree and sometimes what others don’t understand is emotional is really not a bad thing. I wish I could be emotional most of the time, but as men we just can’t afford that.
Cheers!
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good one
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Thank u
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“lovers with serious mental health issues” wow, this is insane…i can only imagine
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Yes, it was a difficult time. If I have any regrets, that would be I wished I was stronger to handle that back then.
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I knew of some friends too whose girlfriends are sort of psycho ..lol
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Nice one.👌
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